Carpe Diem Y’all by Michele Bernard

Writer, Texan, Semi-interested Sports Fan

Best Lines: On Writing

19683030281.jpg“A freelance writer is one who is paid per word, per page or perhaps.” – Robert Benchley


February 28, 2008 Posted by | Best Lines, Freelance Writing, Humor, Humor Writers, Writerly Stuff, Writers, Writers Who Say It Way Better Than Me, Writing | Leave a comment

Dad – Mom’s Hogging the Microphone

rock_band_cover.jpg“We weren’t too ambitious when we started out. We just wanted to be the biggest thing that ever walked the planet.” Steven Tyler of Aerosmith

I was over video games when controllers went from two buttons to something resembling a ten-key punch.

Then, last night, my 15 year old opened his birthday present .

Life may never be the same.

(And yes, son, I will pay for your therapy.) 

In the meantime: Rock on party people. 

Game Spot Score 9.0 Editor’s Choice:  Rock Band does a superb job of bringing out the wannabe rock star in all of us, and creates one of the best party-game experiences of all time.  –

Carpe Rockem Y’all, Michele

January 26, 2008 Posted by | Best Lines, Blogroll, Carpe Diem Quotes, Dance, Family, Heart, Her Royal Nerdiness, Humor, Humor Writers, Just Wow, Michele's Musings, Motherhood, Music, Parenting, Winter | 4 Comments

On the 12th Day of Christmas My True Love Gave to Me


The courtesy of not

Laughing his butt off

As he helped me

Up off the floor

When I sprained my ankle

Taking the tree down

Breakfast for supper

His favorite chair

4 icepack treatments

3 fluffy pillows

2 more Advil

And a day of bad reality TV

January 6, 2008 Posted by | Christmas, Family, Her Royal Nerdiness, Humor, Michele's Musings, Winter | 3 Comments

Best First Wedding Dance Ever

Work like you don’t need the money – Mark Twain

December 1, 2007 Posted by | Dance, Dance Quotes, Humor, Just Wow, Michele's Musings | 2 Comments

Carpe Turkiem

turkey_in_bikini.jpgAn optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.  ~Irv Kupcinet

November 20, 2007 Posted by | Autumn, Best Lines, Carpe Diem Quotes, Family, Food and Wine, Humor | Leave a comment

How to Make Small Talk with the Writer in the Family

 Or not.  – Carpe Diem Y’all, Michele

Stewie: You know, that novel you’ve been writing?

November 13, 2007 Posted by | Freelance Writing, Humor, Humor Writers, Michele's Musings, Novel Writing, Novelists, Writerly Stuff, Writers, Writing | 2 Comments

Crank Dat Soulja Boy

While my husband and I are learning to salsa, our kids are doing this:

And they’re not the only ones.  So are


and Barney:

and the Texas Longhorns:

and even Dora the Explorer:

And now, thanks to these folks, you can crank dat soulja boy too:

Carpe Dance’m Y’all, Michele:)

October 16, 2007 Posted by | Dance, Humor, Just Wow, Michele's Musings, Music | 1 Comment


September 14, 2007 Posted by | Humor, Just Wow, Michele's Musings, Music | 2 Comments

Bow Down My Little Nerdlings

4d33c1955392b282.png As you can see, this Nerd Queen scored rather low in the Technology/Computer category, which explains why even with the handy cut and paste code We (that’s the Royal We to you) couldn’t figure out how to post Our scores in such a way that you the reader can just click and figure out what kind of nerd you are.  Next concern:  should We worry that We know way more about Sci-Fi/Comics than We do History/Literature?  This is  a question only a true Nerd Queen would ask.

Carpe Diem Y’all, HRN Michele  <<<<royal waves to a member of the Royal Family>>>>>>

September 13, 2007 Posted by | Family, Her Royal Nerdiness, Humor, Michele's Musings | 8 Comments

New At Bat Song?

I’m always searching for the perfect Life At Bat Song, the song they break into right after your name is called to step up to the plate.  The perfect song needs to provide insight into who you are, inspiration to you as a player, have a motivational beat, be a tone setter for your opponents, and blend well with the clapping and cheering of the fans in your peanut gallery.  So is  I Don’t Dance from Disney’s High School Musical 2 a contender?  Looks like a few big leaguers are trying it on for size.  What’s your At Bat Song?  Carpe Diem Y’all, Michele

August 25, 2007 Posted by | baseball, Dance, Humor, Just Wow, Michele's Musings, Music, Notes from the Cheap Seats, Sports Stuff, Summer | 1 Comment