Carpe Diem Y’all by Michele Bernard

Writer, Texan, Semi-interested Sports Fan

Away Message

181321773pxtirt_th.jpg“A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book. ” ~Irish Proverb

“Can this wait till AFTER baseball season?” I ask the surgeon.

“Uhm, no,” he says, barely able to surpress the chuckle. 

Surely I’m not the first patient to ask this question?

All that to say, it’s not serious, but, I’ll be away from the keyboard and the cheap seats for a few weeks.  The good news is, morphine is included in the deal.

Carpe Diem Y’all, Michele:)

March 13, 2008 Posted by | Michele's Musings | 8 Comments

Best Lines: Writers Who Say It Way Better Than Me

“Deliver me from writers who say the way they live doesn’t matter. I’m not sure a bad person can write a good book. If art doesn’t make us better, then what on earth is it for.” – Alice Walker

March 12, 2008 Posted by | Best Lines, Novel Writing, Novelists, Writerly Stuff, Writers, Writers Who Say It Way Better Than Me, Writing | 1 Comment

Snow Day

snowflake_3d_38322.jpg“Winter is nature’s way of saying, “Up yours.”  ~Robert Byrne 

 I, like most Native Texans, don’t have the survival skills to live north of the Red River.  Case in point:  Today.  It’s snowing. 

“Should we pick the kids up early from school?” I ask my neighbor, the Ohio transplant.

She laughs.

“Okay,” I reply, not convinced.

The phone rings.  It’s a recorded message from my son’s school.  “School will let out at the usual time, but it is okay if you want to pick your child up early.”

I give into the anxiety that makes me want to stop down, build a fire, and hunker down because white stuff is falling from the sky, I bundle up, jump in my truck and make my way to the school, where every other native is waiting in line with a nervous eye to the sky.

I collect my son and head for the store.  I stand in line with even more natives.  We each purchase the requisite survival gear:  eggs, biscuits, milk, and two fake logs.

Grocery sacks in hand, I brave the elements, dodge the traffic jam in the parking lot and jump in the truck.  I turn the key, then tune into the local radio station. 

“Please do not call 9-1-1 to tell us it’s snowing,” says a representive of the sheriff’s department, “We know,” he concludes, “Our phone lines are jammed and we need to free them up for you know, emergencies.”

Like I said, no survival skills.

Carpe Diem Y’all, Michele

March 7, 2008 Posted by | Her Royal Nerdiness, Michele's Musings, Motherhood, Parenting, Southern Humorists, Winter | 5 Comments